The most memorable people in my life are crazy. Funny thing: those people are also the happiest. You don’t need to be crazy to be happy but it sure can’t hurt.
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Original graphic and quote: Stephanie DelTorchio
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9 Fun Things to do in October
It’s time to stow the flip-flops up north, but on borderline days I’ll still wear them for spite.
When the weather starts to chill it’s a good excuse for grown-ups to do fun things — with or without children — and channel their inner child.
Here are a few of my favorites:
What are some of your favorite things to do during the fall?
BE F*CKING AWESOME TODAY!
Original graphic: Stephanie DelTorchio
Cornfield Maze photo credit: By Hugho226 – Own work, CC0, https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?curid=30724285
“David,” the son of alcoholic parents was tossed around the foster care system with two younger siblings until he ran away for good at sixteen. One foster family changed his name to “Michael” because they had a son by the same name.
Despite David’s troubled childhood he went on to have an honorable life with a wife and family. Sadly, his brother and sister died young from substance abuse. David was able to reconcile with his elderly and ill father in time to mend some wounds before his death.
What separated David from his siblings? Why did he fare better?
In his own words, he “made different choices.” He couldn’t change the circumstances of his upbringing, he said. Water under the bridge. But he sure as hell needn’t let his future be controlled by his past.
Whether he was aware or not, David committed to specific tactics that changed his life. Here are few —
8 Ways to Shift Your Circumstances:
1.Let those people go
People rank high on this list. If they’re messing with you, do your very best to cut them off, wave sayonara, send them light and love and kick them the f*ck out of your life once and for all.
2. Take this job and shove it
Ditto for a job or boss who doesn’t honor your time or talents or plain out makes you miserable. You need employment for many years to pay-to-play in this world. Find something that you’ll happily trade your precious time for a paycheck. And for someone who will value your contributions, and reward you. Or do it yourself.
“Circumstances do not make a man, they reveal him.” – Wayne Dwyer
3. Engage socially
Call on your tribe. Hang out with the right people, those who will support and share your ideas and ideals. Join groups or organizations that feed your mind and soul, if that’s what it takes. Often our circumstances will change based on the company we keep.
4. Big changes need big action
We know the definition of insanity: Doing the same thing over and over, and expecting a different result. If it’s a big change in your circumstances you want to make, you’ll need to take some big and ballsy actions. Step out of your comfort zone. Stick all your fears in your back pocket and take them along. Be brave.
“Your present circumstances don’t determine where you can go; they merely determine where you start.” — Nido Qubein
5. Go back to your childhood
Think back to when you were young. What made you laugh and happy when you were playing? You probably played OUTSIDE even in the rain. For hours and hours. You lost track of time building a “jigger” (go-cart), ice-skating, playing sandlot baseball or domestic bliss with your Easy Bake Oven. Play again. Get lost in the day again. Be childlike not childish.
6. Accept what is truly out of your control
Besides crooked front teeth or tropical storms, there are times when life’s unfortunate circumstances can feel as if darts have been hurled in our direction. We escape as best we can using every resource and tool we possess. Still, even with all our hard core training, awards, college degrees and adult smarts, there are days when life is a slow trudge through the mud. You just do the best you can.
“You can often change your circumstances by changing your attitude.”– Eleanor Roosevelt
7. Practice Gratitude
Nothing pushes the woe-is-me off the wall like making a list of blessings in your life. From a roof over your head to a working bladder, giving a shout-out to the Universe for what you DO have is a humbling exercise. It’s not a bad plan to make a short list every day before your feet hit the worn carpet that you’re also grateful for.
8. Get Quiet
Take a walk. Read a book. Meditate. Pray. Whatever works to calm your breathing and put your mind in park. Call it returning to center. Focus. Give it a name if you must as long as the result is a peaceful state of rest.
Back to “David” for a minute.
A tough childhood may have explained his behavioral issues as a teenager or his hardened opinion on what makes a healthy family. But at some point in his life he let the swan sing its song. No lying…he needed to get tough on himself and fight through a lot of hurt and anger. He chose who he wanted to become. The result was, for him, a happy life.
When it comes to coping and/or outwitting the less tragic circumstances, be more strategic. (Note: Of course Big Shit circumstances require more time and more than a few boxes of Band-Aids to fix.)
There’s no magic potion or quick fix being offered here. Old-fashion grit and tenacity, and a willing spirit, can put the odds in your favor to shift your circumstances. Not to just survive but thrive.
Notes from me to you:
What are some of the ways you’ve tried in the past to shift your circumstances?
Please comment below. Your insights and tips will help other people.
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Original graphic & quote: Stephanie DelTorchio
For the rest of us still floating around the galaxy, Seth Godin‘s words of advice are not out of this world. They’re worth exploring.
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This life “assignment” as my uncle says, is brief. This we know. So why do we continue to spend hours and hours working at a job that feels alien?
COMING SOON! I’m tackling the subject of passion using real-world doable assignments to rediscover what you already love and enjoy, and finding a way to turn it into a job you’ll love until your next assignment. I’m calling this quest, “The Passion Explorer”. In a four-part series we’ll go through some questions and exercises to help you match your passion with a job, second career or side hustle.
Got questions? Write them in the comments below.
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Original graphic: Stephanie DelTorchio
There are no small parts just small actors…might be a fine approach should you wish to become an actor. But this is your life and there is ZERO reason to accept bit parts on the grand stage that is your one and only life.
You weren’t put on the planet to live a little bitty life.
Within your own four walls and around the people you know and love, you get the chance every day to take a starring role. To encourage others. To share. To influence. To teach. To inspire.
Play the part for all it’s worth. Come back with a fabulous encore. Then you get to take a well deserved bow.
BE F*CKING AWESOME TODAY!
Original graphic & quote: Stephanie DelTorchio
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Original graphic & quote: Stephanie DelTorchio
Truth is, if you knew what excited you, you’d be doing it already. You’d probably have been doing it for most of your life.
So to be thirty, forty, fifty, sixty years old now and claim that “I don’t know what I want to be when I grow up,” is bullshit. Sorry.
You know exactly what interests you.
As a little kid I wanted to write stories. And I did. I kept that up all through school, to some praise from teachers, too. My parents “discovered” some of my journals tucked between the box spring and mattress. That didn’t go well at all.
It was the 70s. Teenage girl. Sex. Drugs. Rock ‘n Roll. Need I say more?
Following your passion is easy, unless you don’t have one.
So what if you’re still a wanderer seeking that elusive feeling of enthusiasm or excitement for something or about doing something?
Eat, Pray, Love best-selling author Elizabeth Gilbert, suggests that instead of chasing your passion, try exploring it instead. Follow your curiosity. Do this without expectation that anything will come out of it other than joy. You never know, says Gilbert, “but if you let go of your passion and follow your curiosity, your curiosity just might lead you to your passion.”
Mike drop.
BE F*G AWESOME TODAY!
Original graphic: Stephanie DelTorchio
BE F-G AWESOME TODAY!
Original graphic: Stephanie DelTorchio
“Mom, can we go to the zoo?” says the five-year-old.
“Tomorrow,” says the mother.
“Mom, can I have a pony?”
“Later.”
“Dad, when can we get a red sports car like Tommy’s dad?”
“Someday.”
Parents fall back on three textbook answers to nagging questions:
“Later,” “Tomorrow,” and “Someday”.
Why?
Copyright 2012-2016 Stephanie DelTorchio All rights reserved.
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