Gratitude Archives - Page 3 of 5 - Stephanie DelTorchio

Ticket To Ride

Inspirational Quote|befat.net

What kind of amusement park goer are you?

Life is a ticket to the greatest show on earth. Keep your eyes and heart open until your vehicle comes to a full and complete stop.

I make weird analogies about life. Today it’s an amusement park because it most resembled my life for a long time.

From a distance the park was this glowing, beckoning place of wonder. As I got closer my insides bubbled up, barely able to control the excitement. I hoped it was everything I’d dreamed it would be — thrills, greasy food, and lots of fun.

But once our ticket is forked over the initial sensory overload has a certain “walls closing in” feeling, no?

There’s the noise of course — wild screams, hawkers and pitchy music bouncing off scaled versions of familiar buildings.

Visually, the distractions, uhm, attractions, all tug for attention causing one’s eyeballs to skew and look more funhouse than focused. We feel the urgency to hop on every ride, play every game, experience every side show, eat every battered and fried food. And why not?

We understand that each of us is given exactly ONE TICKET to ride and that park hours are limited. We hustle in constant bumper car mode with strangers. Often herded into corrals like mindless cattle, forging the same goal — get it all in before closing time. So many choices, so little time.

Here’s a question: As a ticket holder how do you navigate your “amusement park”?

1. The Wanderer

You wander the park and wait/look for the “right” attraction.
Doing this not only wastes precious time, but you pass on experiences you should try at least once. The Wanderer is a seeker without a plan. A window shopper.

2. The Jumper

You jump on the first ride you come to, based on fear.
“SEIZE THE MOMENT” is The Jumper’s motto, which can be a good thing, sometimes. For legitimate reasons, in or out of his control, The Jumper fears this ride may never be available again. There’s not much forethought and the consequences are often mixed. But remember, although the road is full of many flattened squirrels who couldn’t make a decision, The Jumper creates a different brand of road kill.

3. The Adventurer

You take the ride you want, alone or with others.
The Adventurer shows a bit of The Jumper with the exception of thought-out purpose. Every new opportunity and new introduction is a potential experience to add to the resume and check off the list.

4. The Planner

You map out the park and formulate an attack strategy.
The Planner will get the layout in advance. Methodical by nature, The Planner often gets the to best attractions in the shortest time.

5. The Follower

You are content to to accept the decisions of someone else.
The Follower makes no decisions on their own behalf. Quietly there may be some grumbling or complaining but the blame of not getting on the ride or play the game of choice rests on The Follower.

As you leave the park after the fireworks, a belly full of junk food, loaded down with souvenirs you have a smile of contentment across your face. You should right? Memories of the amusement park – the sights, the sounds, the fun — and the people you’ve shared them with carry you home like a giddy sleepy child.

I want to leave my amusement park feeling that this was the greatest show on earth. You?

BE F-G AWESOME TODAY!

Original graphic and quote: Stephanie DelTorchio

8 Things To Do When Your Day Sucks

Things to do when you have a sucky day befat.net

There are those sucky days. And when you get one, it’s best to cut your loses and give in. Until tomorrow…when you’ll go back to being awesome.

P.S. You’re still awesome — just misplaced, like between the seat cushions.

BE F-G AWESOME TODAY!

Original graphic and quote: Stephanie DelTorchio

What If Life Doesn’t End The Way You Envisioned?

What If I Fall|positive graphic befat.net

What if your life doesn’t end the way you envisioned?

After all, you went through the long process. You did your best. Lived by the Golden Rule (mostly). Paid your taxes. And your dues…

You failed sometimes (or what looked like failure).

You won sometimes (or what looked like success).

You trusted your instincts. Went with your gut.

You trusted people. Worked out with some. Not-so-much with others.

You made a freaking decision, or many decisions. (More than the majority who never do, by the way)

You stepped out and learned something — applicable or not, you stretched your arms, your vision, your brain.

You took a chance.

You showed up. Every. Single. Day. (Alright, just about every single day)

You sweated it, tolerated it, promised it.

You honored it, stood by it, gave it everything you had.

You fixed it when it broke and tried again.

You kept the faith. (When you wanted to throw in the towel)

You tried. Again. And again.

You got involved in something that made you happy and free.

You opened your eyes and your heart to love. (Sometimes it worked out)

So maybe it doesn’t end the way you’d hoped or planned or envisioned.

Just what if it ends a whole lot better? Imagine that.

BE F-G AWESOME TODAY!

Original graphic: Stephanie DelTorchio

Choosing Your Inner Circle

Be with those who help your being. Rumi|befat.net

We get to hand pick the people to let into our super-selective circle.

Who do you let in? A person who helps, supports, and guides you is a cherished gift — that person belongs inside your circle. S/he will hold your hair back while you heave over the toilet bowl after a very long night (okay, college days remembered or a really stupid adult night — sadly, done both).

We DO eventually grow up — somewhat.

As a grown-up, a person deserving of your circle DOES NOT need to be summoned to take your hand while you hear a rotten diagnosis. She’s already there. She bakes a cake and hands you the other fork and you both swear not to tell a soul. She breaks out into riotous laughter that makes you both pee your pants, and then you laugh some more. It’s easy and natural and oh so juvenile, but perfect.

Somehow these people just KNOW when you need a cheer-me-up. An extra pair of hands to hold a ladder. Or advice on making funeral arrangements for your dad. They bring flowers or wine or chocolate for no reason and call just to say “hello”, I miss your company.

Any material offers are given generously without her ever keeping a secret score card to shove back in your face. Because she owns a pure and kind heart and wouldn’t harm a flea on the back hairs of a dog. And for the record, NOT ONCE has her integrity been in question because she demonstrates her loyalty and love to you over and OVER again. Consistent. Reliable. Solid as rock.

Even when you (Me) have been a bit of a shit.

The people we let into our tight circle want for us exactly what we want for ourselves, even when we don’t know it. They are the few, the select, the inner circle. They are gold.

BE F-G AWESOME TODAY!

Original graphic: Stephanie DelTorchio

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The Good Fight

Self-love quote graphic/befat.net

So you’ve fought the good fight.

For you the road from there to here wasn’t always easy. Or straight. Or marked with clear understandable signs. Maybe the road you’ve traveled to get to where you stand now, sucked. Big time.

Or the beginning was just okay. Average. No major tragedies, but not the supportive or loving surroundings you craved. You were a kid. No matter what happened then, you weren’t necessarily in charge of that leg of the journey. Bigger smarter adults drove the bus and you were cool going along for the ride because you were a kid — not much leverage, right?

Then you grew up. Joined the big leagues. Made your own choices.

You lived and (figuratively) died by the times you said “YES” when maybe the best answer was “No, thank you.”

“Yes, I’ll have another drink.”

“Yes, I’ll date you/marry you.”

“Yes, I’ll take this job.”

“Yes, I’ll lend you money.”

“Yes, of course I trust you.”

Conversely, what about all the times you said “NOPE” (too quickly) when saying “yes” may have made things…easier? Nicer? Better? Less freaking complicated! Ah, hindsight.

After all the shit we put ourselves through, it’s a wonder that we’re still standing.

Let’s sum up: You made some good choices and…not-so-good ones.

Okay, so you fucked up plenty of times. But utilizing basic survival tactics — pigheadedness, drive, curiosity, focus, determination, willpower, sacrifice, fear, etc. — you are still here. Pretty cool when you look back, right?

It’s a long slog to get from being a dependent child to a functioning mature adult. And it ain’t always pretty. Take a breath, relax and reflect on how far you’ve come.

Love yourself for fighting the good fight. You’re here now. Carry on. No looking back.

BE F-G AWESOME TODAY!

Original graphic: Stephanie DelTorchio

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Without Shoes? No Problem

#withoutshoes befat.net

This is the time of year (in New England) where any quasi-warm day is a reason to kick off your shoes. Finally after the cold and snow, the toes breathe a sigh of Spring.

Of course around here the early spring of May is no guarantee of flip flop weather. No problem for the diehards who walk around barefoot and in shorts beginning May 1st, no matter if there are traces of frost on the grass or not.

Each year, the folks at TOMS shoe company spend one day #withoutshoes to raise awareness for children’s
health and education. Their dream is that some day, all kids will have shoes.

Today, May 10th, TOMS is asking everyone to Instagram your feet #withoutshoes or your TOMS and help give 100,000 new pairs of shoes to children in 10 countries.

No shoes? No problem.

BE F-G AWESOME TODAY!

Original graphic: Stephanie DelTorchio

Leave A Personal Legacy

befat.net

Famous people with famous legacies

Abraham Lincoln (1809 – 1865) inspired the nation with his Gettysburg Address and helped to bring about the abolishment of slavery.

Nelson Mandela (1918 – 2013) campaigned for justice and freedom in his native South Africa. He spent 20 years in jail for his opposition to apartheid. On his release he healed the wounds of apartheid by his magnanimous attitude to his former political enemies.

Marie Curie (1867 – 1934) awarded a Nobel Prize for both Chemistry and Physics. Her discoveries with radiation helped advance medical science. Also, her achievements were even more remarkable at a time when few women gained education.

Martin Luther King (1929 – 1968) the most influential leader of the non-violent civil rights movement, inspired millions of people, black and white, to aspire for a more equal society.

Leonardo da Vinci (1452 - 1519) – One of the greatest minds in human history. It is wildly believed that da Vinci was centuries ahead of scientific discovery. He furthered advancement in anatomy, astronomy, physics, science and the arts.

Mother Teresa (1910 – 1997) – Lived a life of poverty to try to improve the conditions of others. Her devotion and compassion inspired the lives of many people.

Jane Goodall (1934 – ) – Made ground-breaking study into the behavior of chimpanzees. Goodall became a noted campaigner and activist for environmental protection and kindness to animals.

Mozart – A musical genius whose talents give joy to millions of people.

Rumi – Sufi poet. His mystical poetry continues its universal appeal.

Steve Jobs – Charismatic founder of Apple. Helped create new standards of design in technology.

These famous people changed the world at their time of life, and their legacy lives on.

We need not be political or social heroes, gifted in the arts and sciences, or spiritual leaders to leave behind an enduring legacy.

The thing about personal legacies is often we don’t know we’ve left one. Good or bad.

A kind gesture, an encouraging word, a thoughtful gift; human exchanges we encounter throughout our lives make us want to be better people. Conversely, a person who is angry, cheats, lies, proves irresponsible again and again, any kind of destructive behavior…leaves us feeling something else altogether. Both are memorable legacies.

I vote for kind and gentle legacies.

The father who watches his daughter change a tire under his direction teaches her self-sufficiency.

The mother who rehearses “the first dance” with her son demonstrates the importance of tenderness and romance.

A coach who plays everyone on the bench defines what it means to be a player on his team.

The boss who encourages employees understands they are the future of the organization.

The middle-school math teacher who stays after school to tutor a struggling child and just maybe, huh? discovers the child’s obsession with taking pictures of animals. That child learns to believe that he possesses special talents and gifts (okay, not Algebra!), and goes on to a successful career as a National Geographic photographer.

These simple moments, however fleeting and benign, have the ability to leave a positive mark and endure a lifetime and beyond. Sometimes a legacy is just being the right person in the right place at the right time to change or alter or turn someone’s life in new or better direction. For this, you will be remembered as THE person who influenced a life.

Many of the people in our lives exit this world without awards and ribbons. Yet their names more indelible than if they were etched in stone across some alumni building. We fondly remember the ones who left their great legacy on us — parents, teachers, coaches, bosses, mentors, etc. — for their humanity and spirit. Side note: Those of us with parents or grandparents who emigrated to the United States at great personal sacrifice, we owe a debt of gratitude. We must tell and record their stories for the next generation. With any luck, the histories and legacies we tell bare some semblance to the truth!

Part of my writing journey is expressly for my children. Ideas and ideals that were passed to me from people way smarter and wiser than I’ll ever be. The legacy we leave need not be worthy of a statue in our honor or biographical documentary. By doing our best job to not f-k up in this world is a good enough legacy. But to be a regular person who can be an extraordinary influence on our small personal tribe is more than good enough.

BE F-G AWESOME TODAY!

Original graphic & quote: Stephanie DelTorchio

You Are Beautiful

If you see someone beautiful say something

Today, if you see someone beautiful, say something.

I’m not talking about gorgeous women (and men) on magazine covers who may or may not have been generously (airbrushed) blessed with flawless skin and thick eyelashes; desirable tall frames in barely there bikinis with stick-like legs that go on for days. No doubt these freaks of nature exist. Bless them…

I’m talking about TRULY BEAUTIFUL people. The real, inner beauty that once seen for its value should take our breaths away, more than a mock-up version of commercial beauty.

To the harried young mother juggling two babies and a cartload of groceries, wondering if she’ll ever fit in her “regular” clothes again — you are beautiful.

To the elderly man who holds the hand of his struggling wife — you are beautiful.

To the countless volunteers who give their time and energy to causes near and dear to the their hearts — you are beautiful.

To the men and women who put their lives in front of the public to keep us safe and secure — you are beautiful.

To the people who are lost and wandering, we pray your path is illuminated with trust and direction — you are beautiful.

To the ill and the dying, even when your body is struggling to heal or deciding it’s time to take the journey home — you are beautiful.

To the nurturers and caregivers, with their compassion and unselfish dedication to making another person’s life more comfortable — you are beautiful.

To the unsung workers who sweat in the brutal heat and bitter cold to make our public spaces safe and enjoyable — you are beautiful.

To the children who share their innocence and make us laugh — you are beautiful.

To the readers of this page who grant me your time, and the latitude and freedom to share my rants and thoughts — you are beautiful.

P.S. These are the people I encountered today. Who are the beautiful people you encountered today? Please add to the list and post if you like.

BE F-G AWESOME TODAY!

Original graphic and quote: Stephanie DelTorchio

On The Passing Of Time

befat.net

Today I am painfully aware of how fast time is passing by. Caught somewhere between yesterday and its memories, today’s check and balance of reality (it’s trash pick-up day), and the future which I can not begin to imagine or predict with any certainty.

I love this paraphrased quotation for its smack of truth as it relates to our existence on this planet. Our past, present and future collide in this moment. That’s what we have. This moment. Nothing more.

BE F-G AWESOME TODAY!

Original graphic: Stephanie DelTorchio

Plant It Forward

befat.net

The first plants I ever purchased for my home were from a local Ladies Garden Club. Mostly older women, they wore wide brim hats and gloves, all proper Victorian-looking to me.

Each plant, harvested straight from their own gardens, had received years of tender administration which I was too immature a gardener to appreciate. For a few dollars I was handed a wrapped ball of Bleeding Hearts, Hostas and Lady Slippers. The warmth and richness of the soil in my hands lingered as the gardener shared the history behind each plant. The Bleeding Hearts, a wedding gift from her mother-in-law. The shade loving Hostas from a neighbor as a welcome gift. The showy, yellow Lady Slippers taken from the woods along a path that lined a dirt beach pathway.

I felt as if she’d just handed me her babies. My duty going forward was to plant them, care for them, let them grow to be big and strong. Was I worthy of this responsibility?

When I thanked the woman for the plants she admonished me. Apparently there’s an old wives tale about thanking someone for plants — don’t do it. “It’s best to take them and say you’ll give them a good home,” she said. Okay, weird.

Nearly 35 years and two homes later (couldn’t leave without some) these plants make me smile each spring when their new shoots break through the topsoil. It’s funny, but I silently thank those lovely ladies for their stories, then look over my shoulder.

Over the years I’ve received many clippings and root balls from friends and family. I cherish the armful of tangerine Daylilies my Mom brought me from her yard. Hers came from my grandmother who received a pot of them from her sister, my neighbor for several years. After my great-aunt’s passing, a young couple moved into the home. I gifted them with pots of divided Daylilies, their great-great-great grandchildren.

Today my garden overflows with Rosemarie’s pink and purple phlox, Sheila’s red poppies, my Mom’s daylilies and Rose-of-Sharon trees, Leah’s Montauk daisies and Autumn Joy sedum. Every year I take pictures and share as a reminder of our longtime friendships that continue to grow.

I’ve given them a good home and given them away to good homes.

Request: Please share images of plants, trees, or flowers someone has given you that you’ve transplanted in your own space, or plants that you’ve given away.

BE F-G AWESOME TODAY!

Original graphic and quote: Stephanie DelTorchio

Category - Gratitude

Famous people with famous legacies