Acceptance Archives - Page 4 of 7 - Be F-g Awesome Today! #BeFAT google4228e52aa5dfebc8.html

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Category - Acceptance

1
Believe In You
2
An Optimist Springs!
3
You Will Be Just Fine
4
If You’ve Got It, Rock It
5
Write Yourself A Love Note
6
Judging By What They Say (About You)
7
Still Awesome When Closed
8
Break From the Group
9
Don’t Wait For Spring
10
10 Quotes on Self-Love

Believe In You

_ Believe in yourself 3.29.2016

I’m not sure who else needs this message today besides me! The past few days, although very busy, hardly have felt productive, in the sense that nothing I’d planned to do got done. Anybody else out there?

Every once in a while I need to press RESET to remember the goal again, feel the desire again and get back in gear, again.

My recent obstacles, all good, have focused on others and not me. Not a bad thing of course, but I know that I know my “thing” inside me needs attention.

BE F-G AWESOME TODAY!
Original graphic: Stephanie DelTorchio

An Optimist Springs!

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Spring is a time of rebirth, renewal and resurrection. How can one not be upbeat and optimistic after a long winter’s stretch. The sight of tender green shoots and the sweet rhythm of birdsong all around give us hope in the belief that we get yet another season to awaken, reach out and grow. Glory Be!

BE F-G AWESOME TODAY!
Original graphic: Stephanie DelTorchio

You Will Be Just Fine

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Today I learned of a casual acquaintance who was having a tough day. Her health took a turn; not life threatening it seems, but nerve-wrecking just the same. Who hasn’t had a personal day or string of days like this? Maybe if not you personally, but maybe someone close to you.

I hope this message finds its way to her and anyone else out there whose day didn’t end with a lottery winning but something more reminiscent of a booby prize! Wash away this crappy day and just know you’ve survived it and you will survive another one. You’re so much tougher than you know. Blessings!

BE F-G AWESOME TODAY!

Original graphic and quote: Stephanie DelTorchio

If You’ve Got It, Rock It

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Instead of being critical or spending energy on what you lack, why not rock out all the gifts and attributes you do?

This woman passed me recently and while the moment was brief, I was able to snap her photo from the passenger window of the car. She wore a long thick coat, boots, a kicking hat and formal gloves completed the ensemble. At first site she caused a stir in our vehicle as she sped by in a single-minded purpose. There was some giggling and references to our future old age.

But here’s the thing: the memory of her has stayed with me.  Why?  I thought that this is EXACTLY the way we should behave. By own our light. In all our glory. Out in the open.

This woman (I’m making assumptions here, of course) used a bike to get to and from where she needed to go. She dressed however she felt was appropriate or necessary for the task or occasion. And she didn’t appear to give a hoot what the pea brains like me might think about any of her choices.

For her to be riding at all meant she’d managed to keep in good shape. She was coordinated, too, balancing the ride with a cell phone in her hand and, trust me, she was cruising through the streets.

Point is she was doing it. Working it. Rocking it.

BE F-G AWESOME TODAY!
Image: Personal photo

Write Yourself A Love Note

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Not every day is a “Winner Winner Chicken Dinner” right?

It felt a bit silly, but I wrote myself a little love note. It’s ballsy to post it but ask me if I care?

If you’re in a bit of a rut, or having a chicken-less day, write out a few kind words about yourself. Go the distance and write the note on a lovely card. Stick it in an envelope, put a stamp on it and mail it to yourself. It will surely bring a smile to your face when it arrives in your mailbox.

If you’re feeling ballsy, post it.

BE F-G AWESOME TODAY!
Original graphic and quote: Stephanie DelTorchio

Judging By What They Say (About You)

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A friend of mine, accompanied by a friend of hers,  came by to drop off a book she’d borrowed. I gave the woman the “nickel tour” of my home and offered them both something to drink. We chatted for a while, general conversation, nothing heavy or deep, and then I walked them to the car. Later my friend commented that her friend was surprised that I’d been so nice and open to letting her in my home, after what she’d heard about me.

Here’s the thing: The visitor had never met me. She relied on hearsay from someone who apparently wasn’t a big fan of mine. The inference was made and conclusion drawn before she’d had a chance to form her own opinion. Maybe she expected to see horns creep out from my hair or fire shoot from my eye sockets. I don’t know.

Another friend and I went back and forth over places to grab lunch. I mentioned a new restaurant in town I hadn’t tried yet. She squashed it immediately. I’m paraphrasing here but her reasoning went something like this: “The food was so-so. The fries came out cold. I could make a better burger at home; it was overcooked, but the seeded bun was good, from a local bakery.”

When I asked when she’d had this horrible restaurant experience (and this is a direct quote) her answer was : “Never.”

My lunch friend recanted someone else’s restaurant experience and passed it to me as her own. For this I called her out, as friends can do and still remain friends. I felt bad for the restaurant. Boycotting a place because of an second or third-hand review could catch on like wildfire and ultimately destroy someone’s livelihood. I suggested we try it and judge its  merits by our experience. Which we did. And it turned out to be a good experience.

I’m sure that somewhere or sometime ago I rubbed a person the wrong way, intentionally or not. That made me fair game for someone to start the narrative and share it among willing listeners.

Whether we call these narratives rumors or innuendos or gripes doesn’t matter. Once the word is out, there’s no way to recant it. And chances are good, people will insist that what they heard is the gospel truth, when the correct answer probably strides somewhere in the middle.

Perhaps the chef prescribed to the USDA’s meat chart to judge a medium-well hamburger, and the customer received it perfectly, still, it wasn’t what s/he expected. Or the original source said “it was a bit over done for my liking” which turned into a slam bash heard around the town.

The person who believed what had been said about me, before ever having a two second conversation, in all probability shared those words in some form with another person who also doesn’t know me.

I remember just before entering a college classroom someone stopped me. “Oh no, you’re not taking World History with Chante are you?” And then he went on to give a scathing review of the professor. My opinion was formed before my bottom hit the seat; I would hate this class and hate the instructor. I’d already failed in my mind because someone said the teacher spoke in an unintelligible accent and assigned ridiculously tight deadlines.

For better or worse judgements and reviews work to influence our buying decisions and social affiliations. Then we take it one step further and repeat (embellish upon?) what we’ve heard before our personal experience becomes the yardstick by which we judge.

Conversely, when someone blows pretty blue smoke and rainbows up your backside, well…a good review or glowing praise are equally to be taken in stride.

BE F-G AWESOME TODAY!
Original graphic: Stephanie DelTorchio

Still Awesome When Closed

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I snapped this (very poor quality) photo that was in a storefront window located in a swanky little art district. The shop was (duh) closed for the evening but the artist within posted this sign that made me say, “Yeah! That’s right!”

How cool to know that even after we’ve retired for the day we are still awesome. Love it.

BE F-G AWESOME TODAY!

Image: Personal, really bad iPhone nighttime picture.

Break From the Group

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A group mentality is absolutely necessary in team sports. The success of school projects and work projects depends on the strength of its group participants. Still, there is a fair amount of latitude within groups.

For instance, although sports team members spend much time together — to practice plays, discuss strategies and review past performances (via films, etc.), individual players spend solo time in the gym conditioning their bodies, working alone or with sports psychologists on mental and visual preparation and maybe personalized diet regiments. School and work groups also break out individually — to research or prepare their specific contributions as it relates to the strength of the whole group.

Then there’s a whole nuther group — the friends, family, social groups…

But when is it time to break from the group and either join another group or fly solo? Here are a few signals that should make you think it’s time to consider breaking from the pack:

When your inclusion in a group no longer serves your personal needs or goals.

When your participation in a group is on a path different than what you’ve planned — stunts your growth, halts your aspirations and sidelines your dreams.

When the leadership of the group dominates your free thinking and creative intuition — when your voice doesn’t seem to matter; your talents are ignored or unappreciated.

When you have outlived your usefulness to the group and will die a slow death doing this same task from 9 to 5 for the next 10, 20, 30 years.

When you no longer share the group’s vision, and they’re not receptive to yours.

When your passion and heart is gone. (Maybe you’re bored?)

It’s okay to outgrow the group. Sometimes the best thing for you and the group is to fly away. To another group. Or solo.

BE F-G AWESOME TODAY!

Don’t Wait For Spring

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The day I gave up waiting for the right moment took a very long time in the making. For years the excuses and roadblocks piled up. All legitimate reasons to put the dream job, dream career, bliss following…whatever, on the back burner. None were sacrificial, like donating a kidney or saving a forest, just life taking priority — spouse, children, obligations. I mindlessly became a cog in the wheel, spinning to someone else’s agenda, all the while thinking “some day”.

It was January, three years ago when “someday” arrived. I walked into the family room and held up a letter that had arrived in the mail. My husband looked at me over his glasses, and waited. With more than 30 years of my dramatic displays, he didn’t flinch.

Then I waved the business size envelope with what I think would be the same excitement as if the Massachusetts State Lottery had sent us a big fat check.

“I hold in my hand,” I said, smugly, “the last college tuition bill we are willingly going to pay.”

Our last kid was ready to graduate in the spring. And now, after all our due diligence as responsible parents, we were officially taking #3 off the payroll. This was to be my time. We’d had meetings about this pending day. It had been part of the big plan. I would leave my job and write something. Anything. It didn’t matter what I produced so long as I used the time to produce. There was never a question in my mind that I would write with the same passion and energy I’d given my family and other obligations.

I wasn’t looking to end a career, rather to start living my dream.

BE F-G AWESOME TODAY!

Original graphic and quote: Stephanie DelTorchio

10 Quotes on Self-Love

befat.net Charlie Chaplin on Self Love

“I will not allow anything outside of myself determine my happiness.”
~Unknown

“What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.
”
~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

“People are like stained-glass windows. They sparkle and shine when the sun is out, but when the darkness sets in their true beauty is revealed only if there is light from within.”
~Elisabeth Kübler-Ross

“Remember always that you not only have the right to be an individual, you have an obligation to be one.”
~Eleanor Roosevelt

“The most powerful relationship you will ever have is the relationship with yourself.”
~Steve Maraboli, Life, the Truth, and Being Free

“To be beautiful means to be yourself. You don’t need to be accepted by others. You need to accept yourself.”
~Thich Nhat Hanh

“Believing in our hearts that who we are is enough is the key to a more satisfying and balanced life.”
~Ellen Sue Stern

“You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love & affection.”
~Buddha

“Whatever you are doing, love yourself for doing it. Whatever you are feeling, love yourself for feeling it.”
~ Thaddeus Golas

“If only you could sense how important you are to the lives of those you meet; how important you can be to people you may never even dream of. There is something of yourself that you leave at every meeting with another person.” ~Fred Rogers

“To love oneself is the beginning of a life-long romance”
~Oscar Wilde

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Charlie Chaplin on his 70th birthday…

As I began to love myself I found that anguish and emotional suffering are only warning signs that I was living against my own truth. Today, I know, this is AUTHENTICITY.

As I began to love myself I understood how much it can offend somebody as I try to force my desires on this person, even though I knew the time was not right and the person was not ready for it, and even though this person was me. Today I call it RESPECT.

As I began to love myself I stopped craving for a different life, and I could see that everything that surrounded me was inviting me to grow. Today I call it MATURITY.

As I began to love myself I understood that at any circumstance, I am in the right place at the right time, and everything happens at the exactly right moment, so I could be calm. Today I call it SELF-CONFIDENCE.

As I began to love myself I quit stealing my own time, and I stopped designing huge projects for the future. Today, I only do what brings me joy and happiness, things I love to do and that make my heart cheer, and I do them in my own way and in my own rhythm. Today I call it SIMPLICITY.

As I began to love myself I freed myself of anything that is no good for my health – food, people, things, situations, and everything that drew me down and away from myself. At first I called this attitude a healthy egoism. Today I know it is LOVE OF ONESELF.

As I began to love myself I quit trying to always be right, and ever since I was wrong less of the time. Today I discovered that is MODESTY.

As I began to love myself I refused to go on living in the past and worry about the future. Now, I only live for the moment, where EVERYTHING is happening. Today I live each day, day by day, and I call it FULFILLMENT.

As I began to love myself I recognized that my mind can disturb me and it can make me sick. But as I connected it to my heart, my mind became a valuable ally. Today I call this connection WISDOM OF THE HEART.

We no longer need to fear arguments, confrontations or any kind of problems with ourselves or others. Even stars collide, and out of their crashing new worlds are born. Today I know THAT IS LIFE!

BE F-G AWESOME TODAY!

Original graphic: Stephanie DelTorchio

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