Personal Development Archives - Page 7 of 13 - Be F-g Awesome Today! #BeFAT google4228e52aa5dfebc8.html

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Category - Personal Development

1
Is It Laziness?
2
Act As If You Only Have One Life
3
Free and Wild
4
Break From the Group
5
Stop Dreaming. Start Living.
6
Don’t Wait For Spring
7
10 Quotes on Self-Love
8
Is It Good For You?
9
Does It Bring You Joy?
10
Screw It Today

Is It Laziness?

befat.net/is-it-laziness-procrastination

Why do we do it?

Before I hit the floor I have a plan for the day. I go over it in my head. Deadlines first, then obligations in order of importance, then all the rest. I’m rather ambitious in my plan, often overly ambitious to a fault.

You’d think procrastination runs counter to someone like me with such an organized regiment. And you’d be wrong. This over-reaching often ends in self-wallowing defeat. It’s a case of the mind is willing but the rest of me says: Hahaha, you’re funny.

On a daily basis I play this cat and mouse game with my head. I can dream up any number of delay tactics, i.e. excuses for not getting my ass in gear.

It starts at the same time I finish the mental checklist: The coffee tastes so good I’ll have another cup, while I sit in bed, and watch the same news from an hour ago. I tell myself to get a move on, then reorganize the TO DO list in my head. I wonder if today is “Arms” or “Legs” or “Abs” day. No, I think it’s “skip” day. The overflowing basket of laundry taunts me, and heck, I have no clean jeans to wear. Since I’m not seeing anybody today why not hang out in the jammies?

This round-robin self-inflicted madness serves only one purpose. To stop me from doing my job.

I’m all for chilling and deliberately doing nothing. There’s a time and place for it. Just not today. I know this intellectually, and yet I’m still in bed still sipping coffee. It’s very good.

I Googled “procrastination” and chuckled at the array books and articles out there on the subject. One article lists 7 strategies for curbing procrastination.

#1: Write a list of everything you have to do today.

Okay, I like lists. Even mental lists count. Good. Check.

#2. Write a statement of intentions.

A statement of what? And here I gave up. There’s no reason to write down why or how I intend to tackle my list. What I need is a good swift kick in the fanny and get out of bed. I will do just that. After another cup of coffee. It’s really good.

BE F-G AWESOME TODAY!
Image: Personal (of my handwritten note)

Act As If You Only Have One Life

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We get this one shot at the brass ring right? I mean I’m cool if I get to come back to this planet, or another, maybe reincarnated as a bird? How does the old joke go?

I’m coming back as a bird to fly around and shit on all the people who shit on me.

Click To Tweet

I’ve passed the revengeful phase of my life (waste of time) and moved on to the enjoying and fulfillment phase. You?

So you’ve got all these plans for your life? And, may I be so bold to ask what you are doing about them? No matter you current age, like someone probably already told you, there’s no time like the present to get moving.

Need some inspiration? Consider this list adapted from a Business Insider article that proves you are never too young, or too old, to accomplish great things.

  • At age 1, Christian Friedrich Heinecken, the legendary child prodigy, had read the Pentateuch (the first five books of the Bible).
  • At 2, speed skater Bonnie Blair began skating. She would go on to win five Olympic gold medals.
  • At 3, Wolfgang Mozart taught himself to play the harpsichord.
  • At 4, Brazilian Formula One race car driver Ayrton Senna da Silva began driving.
  • At 5, Yo-Yo Ma, world-famous cellist, began playing “Suites for Unaccompanied Cello” before bed each evening.
  • At 6, Willie Hoppe, the greatest billiards player in history, began to play pool. He had to stand on a box to reach the table.
  • At 7, English philosopher and economist John Stuart Mill had mastered Greek.
  • At 8, three-time Olympic gold medal runner Wilma Rudolph took her first step after suffering from polio as a child.
  • At 9, Daisy Ashford wrote her bestselling novel, “The Young Visiters.” It sold over 200,000 copies.
  • At 10, Vinay Bhat became the youngest chess master in the world.
  • At 11, pilot Victoria Van Meter became the youngest girl to fly across the United States.
  • At 12, Carl von Clausewitz, general and writer of “On War,” joined the Prussian army.
  • At 13, actress, director and producer Jodie Foster wrote and directed a short movie called The Hands of Time.
  • At 14, Romanian gymnast Nadia Comaneci became the first athlete in Olympic history to achieve a perfect 10.
  • At 15, Swedish tennis star Bjorn Borg dropped out of school to concentrate on tennis.
  • At 16, American sharpshooter Annie Oakley challenged and defeated the well-known marksman Frank Butler by hitting a dime in midair from 90 feet.
  • At 17, soccer legend Pele won the World Cup for Brazil and then passed out on the field.
  • At 18, Norwegian mathematician Niels Henrik Abel proved that it was impossible to solve the general equation of fifth degree by algebraic means.
  • At 19, Abner Doubleday devised the rules for baseball.
  • At 20, Charles Lindbergh learned to fly.
  • At 21, Thomas Edison created his first invention, an electric vote recorder.
  • At 22, Olympic runner Herbert James Elliott, one of the greatest mile runners ever, retired undefeated.
  • At 23, English poet Jane Taylor wrote “Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star.”
  • At 24, Ted Turner took over his father’s billboard advertising business. He later launched cable news network CNN.
  • At 25, Janis Joplin made her first recording, “Cheap Thrills,” which grossed over $1 million within a few months.
  • At 26, Soviet cosmonaut Valentina Tereshkova became the first woman to travel in space.
  • At 27, Kurt Vonnegut, Jr. left his job at General Electric to become a full-time writer.
  • At 28, Jamaican reggae composer/performer Bob Marley recorded “I Shot the Sheriff.”
  • At 29, Scottish-born inventor Alexander Graham Bell transmitted the first complete sentence by telephone.
  • At 30, physicist Armand Fizeau measured the speed of light.
  • At 31, French Egyptologist Jean Francois Champollion deciphered the Rosetta stone.
  • At 32, Alexander the Great had conquered almost the entire known world.
  • At 33, Walter Nilsson rode across the United States on an 8-ft. unicycle.
  • At 34, Francis Scott Key, after witnessing the bombardment of Fort McHenry, wrote “The Star-Spangled Banner.”
  • At 35, Sir Frederick William Herschel, an English astronomer, invented the contact lens.
  • At 36, Barthelemy Thimonnier developed the world’s first practical sewing machine.
  • At 37, Jersey Joe Walcott became the oldest man ever to win the world heavyweight boxing title.
  • At 38, Apollo 11 commander Neil Armstrong became the first person to set foot on the moon.
  • At 39, Sharon Sites Adams became the first woman to sail alone across the Pacific Ocean.
  • At 40, Hank Aaron hit his 715th home run.
  • At 41, Rudyard Kipling became the youngest Nobel Prize Laureate in literature.
  • At 42, Kareem Abdul-Jabbar became the oldest regular NBA player.
  • At 43, baseball player Nolan Ryan pitched the sixth no-hitter of his career.
  • At 44, George Washington crossed the Delaware River and captured Trenton, NJ.
  • At 45, Andre Marie Ampere, a French physicist, discovered the rules relating magnetic fields and electric currents.
  • At 46, Jack Nicklaus became the oldest man ever to win the Masters.
  • At 47, Kent Couch attached 105 helium balloons to a lawn chair and flew 193 miles.
  • At 48, Umberto Eco, a professor of semiotics, wrote his first novel, “The Name of the Rose.”
  • At 49, Julia Child published her book, “Mastering the Art of French Cooking.”
  • At 50, P.L. Guinand, a Swiss inventor, patented a new method for making optical glass.
  • At 51, The Marquis de Sade, imprisoned for much of his life, wrote the novel “Justine.”
  • At 52, Sir Francis Chichester sailed around the world alone in a 53-foot boat normally manned by a crew of six.
  • At 53, Walter Hunt, an inventor, patented the safety pin.
  • At 54, Annie Jump Cannon became the first astronomer to classify the stars according to spectral type.
  • At 55, Pablo Picasso completed his masterpiece, “Guernica.”
  • At 56, Mao Zedong founded the People’s Republic of China.
  • At 57, Frank Dobesh competed in his first 100-mile bicycle ride — exactly 10 years after he was diagnosed with an inoperable brain tumor.
  • At 58, Sony chairman Akio Morita introduced the Sony Walkman, an idea no one seemed to like at the time.
  • At 59, “Satchel” Paige became the oldest Major League baseball player.
  • At 60, playwright and essayist George Bernard Shaw finished writing “Heartbreak House,” regarded by many as his masterpiece.
  • At 61, Charles Cagniard de la Tour, a French doctor, demonstrated that fermentation depends upon yeast cells.
  • At 62, J.R.R. Tolkien published the first volume of his fantasy series, “Lord of the Rings.”
  • At 63, John Dryden undertook the enormous task of translating the entire works of Virgil into English verse.
  • At 64, Thomas Bowdler “bowdlerized” Shakespeare’s works, making them “family friendly.”
  • At 65, jazz musician Miles Davis defiantly performed his final live album, just weeks before he died.
  • At 66, Noah Webster completed his monumental “American Dictionary of the English Language.”
  • At 67, Simeon Poisson discovered the laws of probability after studying the likelihood of death from mule kicks in the French army.
  • At 68, the English experimentalist Sir William Crookes began investigating radioactivity and invented a device for detecting alpha particles.
  • At 69, Canadian Ed Whitlock of Milton, Ontario, Canada, became the oldest person to run a standard marathon in under three hours (2:52:47).
  • At 70, Cornelius Vanderbilt began buying railroads.
  • At 71, Katsusuke Yanagisawa, a retired Japanese schoolteacher, became the oldest person to climb Mt. Everest.
  • At 72, Margaret Ringenberg flew around the world.
  • At 73, Larry King celebrated his 50th year in broadcasting.
  • At 74, Ferdinand Marie de Lesseps began an attempt to construct the Suez Canal.
  • At 75, cancer survivor Barbara Hillary became one of the oldest people, and the first black woman, to reach the North Pole.
  • At 76, Arthur Miller unveiled a bold new play, “The Ride Down Mt. Morgan,” free of the world-weary tone of his previous works.
  • At 77, John Glenn became the oldest person to go into space.
  • At 78, Chevalier de Lamarck proposed a new theory of the evolutionary process, claiming that acquired characteristics can be transmitted to offspring.
  • At 79, Asa Long became the oldest U.S. checkers champion.
  • At 80, Christine Brown of Laguna Hills, CA, flew to China and climbed the Great Wall.
  • At 81, Bill Painter became the oldest person to reach the 14,411-foot summit of Mt. Rainier.
  • At 82, William Ivy Baldwin became the oldest tightrope walker, crossing the South Boulder Canyon in Colorado on a 320-foot wire.
  • At 83, famed baby doctor Benjamin Spock championed for world peace.
  • At 84, W. Somerset Maugham wrote “Points of View.”
  • At 85, Theodor Mommsen became the oldest person to receive a Nobel Prize in Literature.
  • At 86, Katherine Pelton swam the 200-meter butterfly in 3 minutes, 1.14 seconds, beating the men’s world record for that age group by over 20 seconds.
  • At 87, Mary Baker Eddy founded the Christian Science Monitor.
  • At 88, Michelangelo created the architectural plans for the Church of Santa Maria degli Angeli.
  • At 89, Arthur Rubinstein performed one of his greatest recitals in Carnegie Hall.
  • At 90, Marc Chagall became the first living artist to be exhibited at the Louvre museum.
  • At 91, Allan Stewart of New South Wales completed a Bachelor of Law degree from the University of New England.
  • At 92, Paul Spangler finished his 14th marathon.
  • At 93, P.G. Wodehouse worked on his 97th novel, was knighted and died.
  • At 94, comedian George Burns performed in Schenectady, NY, 63 years after his first performance there.
  • At 95, Nola Ochs became the oldest person to receive a college diploma.
  • At 96, Harry Bernstein published his first book, “The Invisible Wall,” three years after he started writing to cope with loneliness after his wife of 70 years, Ruby, passed away.
  • At 97, Martin Miller was still working fulltime as a lobbyist on behalf of benefits for seniors.
  • At 98, Beatrice Wood, a ceramist, exhibited her latest work.
  • At 99, Teiichi Igarashi climbed Mt. Fuji.
  • At 100, Frank Schearer seems to be the oldest active water skier in the world.

BE F-G AWESOME TODAY!

Original graphic and quote: Stephanie DelTorchio

Free and Wild

befat.net

After spending years rehashing the past and worrying about the future, I’ve decided that for the rest of my life, as best as possible, to LIVE in the middle section — TODAY.

It’s often difficult because situations arise that make us revert backwards. We understand intellectually that past losses, missed opportunities, hurts, and the like, are moot. Our hands are washed of the past but we go there anywhere. We can’t help ourselves sometimes.

The future also takes up unnecessary residence because we’ve been warned to plan for the future or else a whole host of crappy things could happen. If we don’t save we’ll end up on the street or in a less than stellar senior care home. I’m all for saving for retirement, a raining day and planning vacations, but projecting and worrying about “what ifs” too far into future robs us of our today.

BE F-G AWESOME TODAY!
Original graphic and quote: Stephanie DelTorchio

Break From the Group

befat.net

A group mentality is absolutely necessary in team sports. The success of school projects and work projects depends on the strength of its group participants. Still, there is a fair amount of latitude within groups.

For instance, although sports team members spend much time together — to practice plays, discuss strategies and review past performances (via films, etc.), individual players spend solo time in the gym conditioning their bodies, working alone or with sports psychologists on mental and visual preparation and maybe personalized diet regiments. School and work groups also break out individually — to research or prepare their specific contributions as it relates to the strength of the whole group.

Then there’s a whole nuther group — the friends, family, social groups…

But when is it time to break from the group and either join another group or fly solo? Here are a few signals that should make you think it’s time to consider breaking from the pack:

When your inclusion in a group no longer serves your personal needs or goals.

When your participation in a group is on a path different than what you’ve planned — stunts your growth, halts your aspirations and sidelines your dreams.

When the leadership of the group dominates your free thinking and creative intuition — when your voice doesn’t seem to matter; your talents are ignored or unappreciated.

When you have outlived your usefulness to the group and will die a slow death doing this same task from 9 to 5 for the next 10, 20, 30 years.

When you no longer share the group’s vision, and they’re not receptive to yours.

When your passion and heart is gone. (Maybe you’re bored?)

It’s okay to outgrow the group. Sometimes the best thing for you and the group is to fly away. To another group. Or solo.

BE F-G AWESOME TODAY!

Don’t Wait For Spring

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The day I gave up waiting for the right moment took a very long time in the making. For years the excuses and roadblocks piled up. All legitimate reasons to put the dream job, dream career, bliss following…whatever, on the back burner. None were sacrificial, like donating a kidney or saving a forest, just life taking priority — spouse, children, obligations. I mindlessly became a cog in the wheel, spinning to someone else’s agenda, all the while thinking “some day”.

It was January, three years ago when “someday” arrived. I walked into the family room and held up a letter that had arrived in the mail. My husband looked at me over his glasses, and waited. With more than 30 years of my dramatic displays, he didn’t flinch.

Then I waved the business size envelope with what I think would be the same excitement as if the Massachusetts State Lottery had sent us a big fat check.

“I hold in my hand,” I said, smugly, “the last college tuition bill we are willingly going to pay.”

Our last kid was ready to graduate in the spring. And now, after all our due diligence as responsible parents, we were officially taking #3 off the payroll. This was to be my time. We’d had meetings about this pending day. It had been part of the big plan. I would leave my job and write something. Anything. It didn’t matter what I produced so long as I used the time to produce. There was never a question in my mind that I would write with the same passion and energy I’d given my family and other obligations.

I wasn’t looking to end a career, rather to start living my dream.

BE F-G AWESOME TODAY!

Original graphic and quote: Stephanie DelTorchio

10 Quotes on Self-Love

befat.net Charlie Chaplin on Self Love

“I will not allow anything outside of myself determine my happiness.”
~Unknown

“What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.
”
~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

“People are like stained-glass windows. They sparkle and shine when the sun is out, but when the darkness sets in their true beauty is revealed only if there is light from within.”
~Elisabeth Kübler-Ross

“Remember always that you not only have the right to be an individual, you have an obligation to be one.”
~Eleanor Roosevelt

“The most powerful relationship you will ever have is the relationship with yourself.”
~Steve Maraboli, Life, the Truth, and Being Free

“To be beautiful means to be yourself. You don’t need to be accepted by others. You need to accept yourself.”
~Thich Nhat Hanh

“Believing in our hearts that who we are is enough is the key to a more satisfying and balanced life.”
~Ellen Sue Stern

“You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love & affection.”
~Buddha

“Whatever you are doing, love yourself for doing it. Whatever you are feeling, love yourself for feeling it.”
~ Thaddeus Golas

“If only you could sense how important you are to the lives of those you meet; how important you can be to people you may never even dream of. There is something of yourself that you leave at every meeting with another person.” ~Fred Rogers

“To love oneself is the beginning of a life-long romance”
~Oscar Wilde

***********************************************************************
Charlie Chaplin on his 70th birthday…

As I began to love myself I found that anguish and emotional suffering are only warning signs that I was living against my own truth. Today, I know, this is AUTHENTICITY.

As I began to love myself I understood how much it can offend somebody as I try to force my desires on this person, even though I knew the time was not right and the person was not ready for it, and even though this person was me. Today I call it RESPECT.

As I began to love myself I stopped craving for a different life, and I could see that everything that surrounded me was inviting me to grow. Today I call it MATURITY.

As I began to love myself I understood that at any circumstance, I am in the right place at the right time, and everything happens at the exactly right moment, so I could be calm. Today I call it SELF-CONFIDENCE.

As I began to love myself I quit stealing my own time, and I stopped designing huge projects for the future. Today, I only do what brings me joy and happiness, things I love to do and that make my heart cheer, and I do them in my own way and in my own rhythm. Today I call it SIMPLICITY.

As I began to love myself I freed myself of anything that is no good for my health – food, people, things, situations, and everything that drew me down and away from myself. At first I called this attitude a healthy egoism. Today I know it is LOVE OF ONESELF.

As I began to love myself I quit trying to always be right, and ever since I was wrong less of the time. Today I discovered that is MODESTY.

As I began to love myself I refused to go on living in the past and worry about the future. Now, I only live for the moment, where EVERYTHING is happening. Today I live each day, day by day, and I call it FULFILLMENT.

As I began to love myself I recognized that my mind can disturb me and it can make me sick. But as I connected it to my heart, my mind became a valuable ally. Today I call this connection WISDOM OF THE HEART.

We no longer need to fear arguments, confrontations or any kind of problems with ourselves or others. Even stars collide, and out of their crashing new worlds are born. Today I know THAT IS LIFE!

BE F-G AWESOME TODAY!

Original graphic: Stephanie DelTorchio

Is It Good For You?

befat.net It's not selfish 2.24.2016

Take care of YOU. The tender administration of self is a necessary gift. Not only for you but for the people around you, too. Remember the saying: “When Mama ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy”? Yeah, that. (And Daddy, too!)

My father once told me that it takes courage and a certain amount of selfishness to be the person you know you were meant to be. Sage wisdom.

Make yourself a priority, the same way you put your child, partner, family pets, financial obligations, civic duties, etc. You easily bend. You are the go-to. You are dependable and reliable for every person in your world. But do you write in ink, private time to discover, dream, create, run, read, etc.?

Putting yourself first (for a change) invites accusatory finger waggling. How dare you leave me/us and do this thing you say you need to do? Our internal voice tends to agree — the gourmet meal isn’t on the table, you’ve declined to serve on a committee, you said ‘no’ to an invitation, you leave work ON TIME! How selfish can you be? Haha.

Doing what is best for you is not self-absorbed, narcissistic behavior but sound internal and creative self-care. Do this, and everybody, including Mama, will be happy.

BE F-G AWESOME TODAY!

Original graphic: Stephanie DelTorchio

Does It Bring You Joy?

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Stand in front of your clothes closet. Take a piece of clothing in your hand and decide if the shirt or pants or jacket or dress still brings you the joy it did when you first fell in love with it. If it does, keep it. If it doesn’t, toss it or donate it. (Full disclosure: I’m a bit late to the party but I’ve just read “The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up: The Japanese Art of Decluttering and Organizing”). I like the notion author Marie Kondo puts forth, truly abbreviated here, that if an object does not bring you joy, it should be sent to the dump or donation pile. That’s one way to clean house and simplify.

After reading the book, I wondered if her proposition could be taken a step further to include people and places.

Of course breaking up with clothes and “stuff” is easier than ending a relationship. My circle of close friends is small but every one in it brings me great joy. This is true for the ones I see often and those I cross paths with sporadically, too. But when a person becomes a drag on your time and energy, it might be time to have the “it’s not you, it’s me” talk. This isn’t just for friends, but also lovers, your boss, your hairdresser, auto mechanic — you get it.

Sometimes moving from a place that no longer offers the same joy it once did is the right move. This includes the place where you work, the school you attend, the restaurant that once served the BEST lobster roll, but now, meh. Even the route you travel every day is subject to change.

No matter whether it’s a personal relationship, a place or a thing, if your hanging onto it no longer enhances your life or brings you joy, it deserves to be deleted from your life. Tough standard you say? Yes, I agree. But what sounds callus or brutal can be truly life-changing and freeing. After you rip off the Band-Aid you’ll find the time and space to invite in things, people and places that DO bring you joy.

BE F-G AWESOME TODAY!

Original graphic: Stephanie DelTorchio

Screw It Today

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So the day didn’t end with a gold star to put on your fridge? Big deal. Today, don’t beat yourself up for what you didn’t get accomplished. Screw it.

Don’t sulk over the pile of stuff sitting in the corner waiting for you (It will be there tomorrow. Promise). The paperwork you finally were going to clean up, the closet you’d haul out before the donation truck shows up, the phone calls you said you’d make (dentist, a friend, etc.)…all of it. The world is not going to end because you, yes YOU, didn’t move a mountain or cook a turkey dinner today. Screw it.

Some days just drag. We feel blah all day, can’t get out of our own way, become stuck in a funk, lie around listless. Today maybe you wandered directionless or crashed into a wall! If the day found you dragging ass (for no reason whatsoever, or because you were a naughty camper last night) get over it and let that hangover feeling pass.

Or worse, you gave your best effort to everything you touched and things still went to shit. You attempted to communicate and despite your clarity, lines got crossed, the message misinterpreted and feelings got hurt. You valiantly stuck to the diet and exercise program until s/he (that domestic rat) took the chocolate chip cookies out of the oven. Oh my…warm cookies. Cold milk. Oh my…Screw it okay?

Today be kind to you. Give yourself the benefit of the same break you’d give others. Yep, sure, we mess up in small ways and royally f-k up more times than we’d care to count. So what? We are human. Beautiful and wonderfully fallible. Creative, marvelous beings capable of both so much and on some days, it seems, so little.

Today, fuggedaboutit.

BE F-G AWESOME TODAY!

Original graphic: Stephanie DelTorchio
Quote: Unknown author

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