Double-Stuffed Greeting and Reward
One of the 1,500 plus tasks under the job title “Parent” is to teach children etiquette and social skills. Item #874 is The Respectful Greeting.
As a child, upon meeting someone I was taught to stand still, be quiet, don’t move. Say hello if told to or risk going to bed hungry.
I might have learned a more global view, and better manners, had my mother sent me to (the totally fabricated) Mrs. Brown’s Finishing School for Girls, a place she threatened to send me more than once.
A foreigner friend pointed out my poor upbringing one morning when I ordered coffee at Dunkin’ Donuts. She deemed my lack of a proper greeting to the server and abrupt order request rude and impolite.
“Americans…You walk up to the counter and blurt out you want: Latte, extra shot of espresso. No greeting at all. Rush, rush.”
She gave me credit for saying please and thank you. Thanks, Mom.
Is this improper conduct nothing more than a culture difference? Yes, and no. Lack of knowledge breeds ignorance. In my case, I grew up an uninformed American child. Nothing more.
Do we miss the social cues to interact politely? Yes.
We’re in a hurry, always. We barely take a breath between checking off to-do’s. We don’t bother to look up and take a minute to make the person across from us feel appreciated, important, worth the muscle movement to offer a smile.
I took my friend’s sweeping admonition to heart and vowed to share this with my now grown up children.
My daughter started a new job in a new city. This change offered the opportunity to practice Item #874.
In the company cafeteria she noticed the servers seemed to go through the motions. They handed over whatever selections were requested from people who barely looked up from their cell phones or broke away from personal conversations.
To her credit my daughter engaged in conversation with the server. She said hello. Asked the woman, who looked tired, how her day was going. Is her family well? The server was taken back a bit, she said.
Only after establishing a respectful greeting did my daughter order lunch: a Caprese Panino. The server smiled. Then removed the tomato, mozzarella and basil from a premade sandwich and overstuffed a specially-made Panino.
While my daughter waited for the sandwich to grill, another person, busy texting on the phone, pointed to a pre-made panino. The server handed over a wrapped sandwich and smiled at my daughter.
Award that girl a Mrs. Brown’s diploma.
BE F-G AWESOME TODAY!
Awesome Kindness
Photo credit: Stephanie DelTorchio (my lunch!)