Stephanie DelTorchio - Inspiration and motivation tips to empower you to do what you love before you die google4228e52aa5dfebc8.html
1
It Might Suck Or It Could Be Great
2
13 Really Good Dream Killing Excuses
3
Don’t Break The Chain
4
I Like Long Walks On The Beach At Sunset
5
How To Chronicle Your Life
6
Why Do It At All?
7
Playing It Safe, And Why It’s Killing You Inside
8
So You Had A Bad Day
9
Believe In Self-Made Magic
10
Keep On Truckin’

It Might Suck Or It Could Be Great

 inspirational quote keep going.jpg

It’s so easy to quit and walk away when things start looking sketchy. “If you’re going through hell, keep going,” said Winston Churchill. That’s where you’ll find the good stuff.

We love beginnings

You know when you start a new project or job or exercise program or perhaps a business or course, and you think to yourself: “This is going to be great!”

That’s what beginnings are right?

Full of hope and promise.

You’re pumped. Energized. Adrenaline rushed.

THIS time you swear it’s going to work out perfectly.

Because you planned it.

On purpose.

With lots of thought and front end work.

You can practically taste victory.

The timing seems right.

All the dots connect.

So you begin.

You take the leap. And keep at it. Day after day. From morning until night. You’re on a path and there’s nothing to stop your progress. When you’re in the groove it feels as if you’re flying.

Until…

You get to the middle. Where things gets muddled. And hard.

All of a sudden you crash. You question every motive and intention.

What seemed clear in your mind now is clouded.

You begin second-guessing if this was the right thing to do.  If this was the right time to start.

Maybe the little voice that encouraged you was wrong…

Stop it, okay?

You DO NOT stop because shit happened that made your journey a bit bumpy.

You seriously committed to this thing, right? For like, what? the millionth time?

You’re a grown up person who understands that not every day is full of rose-scented farts. Some are total stinkers.

At some moment you convinced yourself everything is wrong. It sucks. You suck. Everybody sucks…

Well, you might be right. But you won’t know that for sure until you finish. Then you’ll regroup and redo and revise. And keep at it. Because it’s worth it to YOU.

If you’re feeling wishy-washy it’s okay to take a SHORT break. Try these no nonsense suggestions:

bubble bath.jpg

Take a long bath or shower

Rinse those self-defeating feelings away. Let the warm water wash over all the negativity and second-guessing. Bonus: Before getting out of the tub or shower spend sixty seconds under the cold water. Turns out there are some serious benefits to taking a cold shower. 

person walking.jpg

Take a long walk (or a run, if that’s your thing)

Step away and go outside. Get some fresh air and let your mind wander. For an added kick try walking backwards. Besides having health benefits, and making you look foolish (hah!) you’ll need to concentrate on NOT falling. That should clear up the muddles.

person singing into microphone.jpg

Sing it out

C’mon admit it you’ve done it. Crank up the music and belt out your favorite song. Go for the drama — dance moves, hand gestures, shimmy shakes. Singing releases endorphins, which is like a happiness high-five. Sing in public or at your present job at your own risk. There’s always the car radio.

person cleaning toilet.jpg

Clean the toilet

Don’t knock it until you’ve tried it.

This is my personal go-to when I’m confused or stressed or muddled. A silly diversion that requires no thought. I consider it a mindful time-out. Both sides of my brain stop competing for my attention for a few minutes. Sometimes it helps. Sometimes not. At the very least I end up with a clean toilet.**

Keep going

Point is, take a break. A SHORT one. Take care of yourself. Eat and drink something healthy.

Think back to the beginning. Check in with yourself. Remember why you started this crazy thing in the first place.

As my mother would say: “Stand up straight. Slap a smile on your face. And do it.”

Don’t short change yourself today. Keep going. Sure it might suck. But it could be great.

BE F♥CKING AWESOME TODAY! (#BeFAT)

If you enjoyed this post or got something out of it, please subscribe to this blog or leave a comment if you’d like me to create more writings like this. Thanks so much. I hope you have a great day. XO

Original graphic: Stephanie DelTorchio

**According to Sarah from thespruce.com, this is the proper way to clean a toilet. Thanks Sarah!

keep going – motivation – inspiration

inspirational quote to keep going.jpg

13 Really Good Dream Killing Excuses

inspirational quote passion.jpg

Label it by any name you wish — calling, desire, goal, dream, passion, destiny, wish, urge, bucket list — but in order to even taste it, you need to start.

Somewhere.

Anywhere.

Yet we humans are very good at coming up with excuses that prevent us from finding the pot of gold at the end of our own rainbow.

What’s Your Excuse Today?

Think of an excuse you use any time you’re asked about that thing you want to do. Hold it for a second in your mind. Then really think about why you fall back on it. Again and again.

Is it not enough time?

Do you feel opportunities have passed by?

Are you afraid to leave the stability of a shitty job to pursue that thing?

Some excuses can be justified.

Others are self-made roadblocks.

I wanted to write fiction and screenplays and stories since I was twelve years old. I dabbled for years but never produced work that felt worthy of it being put out in the world. You with me yet?

My pockets were stuffed with excuses. Like:

No talent.

No time.

No money.

No education.

No support.

A few very valid and legit ones came later — little kids, a sick spouse — but even those eventually worked themselves out. The kids grew up. My spouse got better. But the other nagging excuses were just a crutch I’d built all by myself. A semi-solid place to lean against when I needed another excuse for not doing that thing I always wanted to do.

Along came the fear

Of everything.

And of “them”.

You know those people. The silent peanut gallery you worry will judge and criticize and condemn the thing that’s been burning a hole in your belly since you could tie your own shoes. And you give that excuse an enormous amount of authority and power.

Time to face reality

At some point you’ll get tired of hearing your own excuses. The outsider noise will fade. You feel the ticking clock of time in the distance, or closer. Because on one day, maybe when you least expect it…POOF! you’re gone. And so is the dream.

You’ve decided that now is the time to get serious about this thing if you’re ever going to make it happen.

So you counter each excuse with positive self-talk or a good slap upside the head. Whatever motivates you to action.

 

If you recognize yourself in any of these excuses, now is as good a time as any to talk yourself out of it and do something.

You’ll have no regrets later for trying. And we’ll be happy you gave it a whirl.

 

1. I don’t feel well

There’s sick, and then there’s really sick. But an ache or sniffle shouldn’t stop you from making progress. Grab a box of tissues, a bandage or drink a hot toddy. Get over the temporary or nuisance condition and charge ahead. Plenty of people with illnesses a million times worse than your head cold have done some brilliant things.

 

2. Family comes first, right?

Most of us put the people we love above our own needs. Feed them something easy one night a week and use that hour for you. Lock yourself in the bathroom or basement if you must. If you can finagle a night or weekend away to focus, do it. Your family will survive quite well without you. Happy you, happy family.

3. Deeply rooted in a career

Maybe you still have student loans from way back. Or you’ve spent fifteen years in the law firm. Or you’re an important person in the family’s business.

The question becomes, are you neck high in something that doesn’t fulfill you? You grapple with how to separate yourself after so long in the same place.

Try to do your thing as a side hustle or pet project until it shows promise. If you find that it’s exactly where you need to be, then decide to pull the weeds and plant something new. Don’t rot on the vine.

 

4. Nobody “gets” anybody

We’re all misunderstood. This is a lame excuse. Stop trying to sell your thing to anybody. You don’t need a majority vote to do what makes you happy.

 

5. A job is a means to an end

You can flip burgers, drive a cab, teach preschool, own a landscape business or perform brain surgery. To a greater or lesser degree, it really doesn’t matter. Each “job” will feed you and pay the bills. But if you’re miserable, it’s time to reconsider how you put bread on your table. If your thing gnaws at you, forget the job. Maybe you’ll eat Ramen noodles for a while. You’ve probably survived on less.

 

6. An unimpressive resume

In the last month alone, four managers expressed to me that the least important part of hiring process was the length and breadth of a candidate’s resume. Without exception each said that they wanted to know two things about you: Whether you can do the work, and if your personality fits with the team. Not much different than grade school: Do your work. Play nice with others.

No doubt you have transferable skills and life experiences that more than make up for a fancy piece of paper.

 

7. Motivational deficiency disorder

Okay, barring any medical issues, laziness is a poor excuse for doing nothing.

When you were six you verbalized it this way: “Whah, whah, whah…But I don’t want to.” Now you’re a grown-up. Curb your nonproductive deficiency by getting off the couch. Remind yourself of that little spark you once had. Get off your ass and go find it.

 

8. Self-esteem snag

Having a lack of belief in yourself keeps you stuck in a place of personal turmoil. It includes self-doubt, self-sabotage, anxiety and depression. Sometimes professional assistance is needed. Please do that. We make no medical claims here, okay?

Other times you need to have a meeting with yourself and a stern talking to (as my Mother liked to say).

It’s not always easy or possible to snap out of it.

Most of us are fine just the way we are, but we’ve bought into the criticism from the outside world that makes us doubt our own gifts, talents and abilities. You’ve got a thing you want to do right? We believe in you. You go and believe in you.

9. I’m afraid of failure

Who isn’t?

Fear of failing stops us from doing the very things that can move us forward. To counter fear, accept that you will fail and ask yourself: What’s the absolute worst thing that will happen if I fail? Answer that question as honestly as you can. Work through the failure in your mind. Once you’ve done that, go do that thing.

 

10. Start at the beginning

Thinking too far ahead will exhaust you.

Steve Martin, talking about students in his Comedy Masterclass, says they wanted to know things like, how to get an agent and where to get head shots taken. Martin says the first thing a new comedian should ask is: “How do I get to be good?”

Take a course. Read books. Ask people you trust. Listen to music. Go to the movies. Spend time in nature. Immerse yourself in whatever your thing is. And then begin.

 

11. Tomorrow plus someday always equals never

“I’d gladly pay you Tuesday for a hamburger today.” This is better deal than I’ll pay you “someday”. Don’t excuse away your today. Tomorrow it’s gone. And someday may never come.

 

12. It’s not an easy thing to do

Sure it’s hard. If it were a cakewalk you’d have done it by now, and so would everybody else.

Just accept the fact that nobody wins the gold medal for running the fastest marathon without first having laced up a pair of sneakers.

 

13. Old dogs can learn new tricks

The American Kennel Club says even old shelter dogs can be trained to learn new tricks. You’re never too old. It’s never too late. Make your age can work in your favor, not against you.

So what’s your excuse?

Life happens.

We can’t always choose our circumstances. We certainly don’t get to choose our beginning in life, but we sure as hell can decide how we finish.

Go after that thing you want to do. Big or small, take a chance on you. There’s no excuse great enough to keep you from trying. You have nothing to lose and everything to gain.

BE F♥CKING AWESOME TODAY! (#BeFAT)

If you enjoyed this post or got something out of it, please subscribe to this blog or leave a comment if you’d like me to create more writings like this. Thanks so much. I hope you have a great day. XO

Other posts you might like:

DID YOU GET SPARKED TODAY?

PLAN TOMORROW TODAY

Original graphic: Stephanie DelTorchio

Photo credits from UNSPLASH photographers:

  1. Photo by Lucas Alexander
  2. Photo by Q’AILA
  3. Photo by Shannon Richards
  4. Photo by Kawtar CHERKAOUI
  5. Photo by Caleb Stokes
  6. Photo by Michelle Phillips
  7. Photo by Nicola Anderson
  8. Photo by Dean Nahum
  9. Photo by Rob Schreckhise
  10. Photo by Enrico Carcasci
  11. Photo by Jakob Owens
  12. Photo by Ryan Grewell
  13. Photo by Ana Martin
  14. Post Cover Photo by Lance Anderson

Don’t Break The Chain

As a struggling young comic, Jerry Seinfeld designed a simple but powerful productivity system to become a top notch comedian and television star. How can you apply this productivity tip to your life? Grab a calendar and a big red marker.
productivity tips, jerry seinfeld don’t break chain, how to more productive

How to be more productive, according to comedian Jerry Seinfeld

Seinfeld figured out that the way to become a better comic was to write better jokes. He’d do this by committing himself to writing one new joke each day.

The Emmy winning comedian tacked a year-in-a-glance calendar to his wall. Each day that he wrote a joke (good or bad wasn’t a factor) he drew an X with a big red marker**.

Soon he noticed that the daily practice created a chain of red X’s. His mission then became to not break the chain.

The now-famous “Don’t Break the Chain” method is a ridiculously simple yet powerful productivity tool. It’s an in-your-face visual reminder to take the big (or small) goals and break them down into doable pieces.

The key to its success is of course consistency.

Don't break the chain wall calendar.jpg

Create your own “Don’t break the chain” wall calendar

 

Okay, so it sounds a bit hokey, but c’mon sometimes the simplest hacks work best.

Put aside your fancy apps and journals and complicated computer programs. Here’s how to make and use the same method that helped Jerry Seinfeld become one of the most successful comedians of all time.

Decide on what you want to track

Whatever the goal or task, use one calendar per task. Start with no more than three. Add more if you feel you can manage them all.

Set daily goals

Whatever the minimum goal, set a task rather than a time limit.

Say you want to achieve doing 30 push-ups each day by the end of the month. Start with one and add one each day.

Maybe you want to contact one new prospect or lead each day for a year.

Or you need to clean out the garage to get your house ready to sell. Pick a shelf or section and tackle one place each day.

Just don’t over reach the daily goals or create too many at the same time. Resist self-sabotage. Make a simple plan and stick to the plan.

Get a calendar and big red marker

If your goal is on-going (writing one joke a day) purchase or print out a large year-at-a-glance wall calendar. For short-term goals, say you want to complete something in a month’s time, print out a 30-day calendar.

Jerry used a big red marker.** Pick a color. Don’t make a production out of this.

Mark each productive day

If you’ve done your thing for the day, put an X through today’s square. Feel’s good, right?

Positive reinforcement

Look at the chain every day. Have you kept it going? Good. Keep it up. Do your thing. X it. Repeat it. You’ll build momentum and not want to miss a day.

Daily action builds habits. Remember building a mountain with one small stone each day for many days? Steady habits create substantial achievement.

Blank spaces

Okay so what about blank space(s)?

Did you make a bunch of (valid) excuses for missing a day?

Don’t beat yourself up. Let it go and start again.

Today psyche yourself out if you must to get it done to earn the X.

How you’ll feel when your chain is unbroken

The next time you really don’t want to do that thing you keep saying you want to do, look at your calendar. How do you feel about the unbroken chain you’re creating? Pretty freakin’ awesome.

It’s a visual reminder of the procrastination you’ve avoided. The progress you’ve made. The pride and empowerment you’ve earned by sticking with it.

Whatever you do, don’t break the chain.

BE F♥CKING AWESOME TODAY! (#BeFAT)

**Use a “little” marker if you want but c’mon, those BIG FAT ones make you feel like you’ve done something powerful and amazing. You earned that.

If you enjoyed this post or got something out of it, please subscribe to this blog or leave a comment if you’d like me to create more writings like this. Thanks so much. I hope you have a great day. XO

Other post you might like:

BE A CREATURE OF GOOD HABITS

Original graphic: Stephanie DelTorchio productivity tips, jerry seinfeld don’t break chain, how to more productive

productivity quote funny.jpg

I Like Long Walks On The Beach At Sunset

Get out.

No, really, get OUT.

As in go outside.

Whether your creative juices have stopped flowing or you’re trying to figure out a personal issue, it’s important (and productive) to still the mind and disconnect. It’s not selfish. It’s self saving.

We know that nature soothes the soul.

Wander in the fresh air and offer thanks to the Universe for blessing you with the gifts of sight, hearing, smell, taste and touch.

Sit on a park bench and listen to the birds sing.

Lie down on the grass and watch the clouds float by.

Talk a walk. A swim. Bike ride.

Whether you practice mindful meditation or just “zone out” in your favorite outdoor spot, give your heavy-thinking brain a break. The world will continue to revolve while you inhale and exhale for a few minutes.

To quote a standard line from the stone age, when personal ads were posted in newspapers:

I like long walks on the beach at sunset.

Still works.

 

BE F♥CKING AWESOME TODAY! (#BeFAT)

If you enjoyed this post or got something out of it, please subscribe to this blog or leave a comment if you’d like me to create more writings like this. Thanks so much. I hope you have a great day. XO

Other posts you might like:

HOW TO CAPTURE TIME
We can’t stop time. But there are things you can do to capture time and make sure that every second counts.

THE SECRET OF LIFE
It’s different of course for everybody. As soon as you find the answer let me know, will ya?

Original graphic: Stephanie DelTorchio
Photo courtesy: Elke Karin Lugert. Thanks Elke!

How To Chronicle Your Life

A life worth living is a life worth recording quote.jpg

When you chronicle or document a bit about your day it can be life changing. What starts off as individual and unrelated moments may steer you (especially upon review) in a direction to make better or different choices for how you spend the time left in your life.

Here’s how to start

Each day take five minutes to record something about that day. You don’t need a fancy journal or fountain pen, but go ahead and use those if they’ll inspire you to keep this habit. Later we’ll talk about five creative ways to help you get started, without pen and paper.

The most important thing to keep in mind is to note what happened that day and how you feel about it. What you hope will happen next is optional, and could be mind-blowing if you’re willing to change. For now, just concentrate on making daily entries into (I made this up) The Chronicles of You.

Read More

Why Do It At All?

Taking a chance is the path to your best self.jpg

Just as a sunflower doesn’t sprout unless the seed is planted and watered, you can’t expect to grow and bloom if you don’t at least disturb the soil.

My mother, who I often refer to as Our Lady of Doom and Gloom, among other things, feared her own shadow. That’s why she protected (uhm, sheltered) us from going out in the world. To her the planet was filled with lions and tigers and bears (oh my) lying in wait to tear small unsuspecting children to smithereens.

“You want to play what? Have you EVER played tennis?”

I stood in the kitchen watching her cut the crusts off peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. “You don’t have a racket. Or tennis sneakers. Besides it’s hot outside. You’ll sweat to death and die,” she said, taking a long drag on her Virginia Slims.

She’d made me think about everything that could possibly go wrong, as if it would go wrong.

She was right of course.

Read More

Playing It Safe, And Why It’s Killing You Inside

Don't die with your music still inside you. Dr. Wayne Dyer quote.jpg

Playing it safe is about the worst thing you can do if you expect to make progress on anything. Living comfortably within the borders ensures that your greatest desires itching to get out remain confined. What to do? You need to step outside what feels comfortable or you’ll die with your gifts and talents inside. What a shame for you and us too.

What if instead of playing it safe — painting everything beige, staying between the lines, living the status quo — you reached out or stretched up and dared to say OUT LOUD that one thing you want to do that scares the crap out of you?

How do you think you’d feel if you lived your truth instead of what everybody else believes (or tries to convince you) is your truth?

It would be, in an overused word: Awesome.

Read More

So You Had A Bad Day

Bad day survival quote.jpg

Let’s face it folks, every day can’t be a winner. No matter how well you’ve planned it out or how positive your attitude when you rolled out of bed, someone, somewhere, some thing will mess it up.

Here’s the good news: You’ve been down this road before.

So if you had a bad day yesterday, congratulations. Guess what?

You’re still here to talk about it. Ready to tackle another one. 

Keep up the good work.

BE F♥CKING AWESOME TODAY! (#BeFAT)

Original graphic: Stephanie DelTorchio

Get no-spam BE F.A.T. POSTS by EMAIL

Save

Save

Believe In Self-Made Magic

Believe in magic quote.jpg

Magic isn’t stuff of movies, sleight of hand trickery or for children at Christmastime. Fascinating, enchanting and spellbinding opportunities circle around you every day. Trouble is we believe it’s there for other people, not us.

To that we say POPPYCOCK! (A proper British term meaning “bullshit“).

When we take a break from our daily bread of murmuring, whining and complaining, the silliest of things can appear magical. The hints show up in the craziest places too. In quiet whispers or banging drums. In rustling leaves or ocean waves. Often IN YOUR FACE.

But only if you wipe away the skepticism. Stop the self-pity behavior. Release the anchors holding you in place.

By burying your face in your hands you can’t possibly see the world moving around you and all the goodness passing by you. And eventually you’ll get light-headed and pass out.

Read More

Keep On Truckin’

Don't focus on what went wrong Focus on making it work inspiration.jpg

Is there anything worse than being derailed on the way to paradise?

You’re driving along, having a nice ride through beautiful vistas and valleys, road map in hand, headed for a destination you’ve been dreaming about and planning — for weeks or months — when WHAM!

Flat freakin’ tire.

This was not the plan. This is NEVER the plan.

Your perfect getaway itinerary was set in stone.

Not once in all the preparations did you make provision for detours or delays or bad luck.

No one (mostly no one) expects that you’ll be forced to wobble away to the breakdown lane like injured roadkill.

A flat tire is a temporary setback. If you’ve got a decent spare in the trunk and the know-how to fix it, it’s not a big deal. Sure you lose a bit of time, utter a few curse words, but no real harm’s done.

But what if you find yourself stranded in the middle of God damn nowhere? Without a spare. Out of cell phone or GPS range. Maybe night is falling.

The stakes are raised a bit.

Besides putting a slight cramp on getting to your destination as expected, a lengthy stop often incites chaos among the passengers.

Fingers point. Blame is laid. Tempers flare.

Somebody ALWAYS needs to pee.

Isn’t day-to-day life like this?

You start off with a perfect agenda — the right man/woman of your dreams, career path in your chosen field, excellent robust health, well-behaved children, loving extended family — and then without notice, things go flat.

You don’t necessarily have alternate options for a bad marriage, company lay-off, cancer diagnosis, troubled teen or family arguments. Most times you’re blindsided by shit flying off the back of a truck. Then you have two options:

  1. If you’re quick, zigzag the hell out of the way
  2. If you’re panicked, hit it dead on (risk a flat, or worse)

Sometimes you must not look back on what just went wrong. In some cases you might need to ride with the flat along the shoulder longer than you’d like, and ease your way into the closest available rest stop. Hopefully they serve hot coffee. Or cocktails.

Often it’s better and more productive to focus on making the situation work. You can try pleading and compromising and sweet treats, but understand that despite all your efforts to change the damn tire, not everything is 100% fixable.

It’s up to you whether you spring for a new tire or keep riding with a flat.

The point is to get back on the road and just keep truckin’.

BE F♥CKING AWESOME TODAY! (#BeFAT)

Original graphic: Stephanie DelTorchio

Get no-spam BE F.A.T. POSTS by EMAIL
Photo credit: Will Langenberg on Unsplash

Save

Save